How to plan your wedding when you have kids

Having kids before getting married is very common in today’s couples. But there are certain things you need to look after when you are having your kids at your wedding, like their behavior, the cost of the wedding and understanding your children’s feelings about your wedding. 
It is the easiest to have a nanny to take care of them while you are having your best day ever, but maybe your kids will end up feeling unwelcome because they are “not invited”. So instead of resorting to toys and nannies, here are some tips on how to involve your kids in your very special day. 

Find a way to entertain them

If your friends have children, they will probably take them if you let them know that it is alright to do so. With many children at your wedding, it can either keep your kids occupied and engaged, or your ceremony can become really messy. 

Include planning for children’s activities at your wedding when you are planning your wedding day. For example, you can gift each child with a toy, and let all the kids play together. If the toys you choose are fun and entertaining, they will keep them calm for a long time. You can find amazing gifts for kids at FuntasticToy.
Have a designated kids area at your wedding where they can spend time when you want your wedding to be quiet and peaceful.
Make sure to plan your wedding around the habits and routines your kids have established. Children are not flexible, so planning to have a family photo before your children take their afternoon nap is essential. 

Opt for a more intimate wedding

If you have kids, the chances are that you are not able to afford a grand wedding. But considering your kids, this is not a bad thing. Children are not fond of such huge crowds, but having a lot of people that they already know won’t make them nervous. Smaller weddings are more comfortable to plan, cheaper to fund, and much better when it comes to keeping order on your big day. It is much easier to keep your child’s well-known day structure, than if you have to deal with hundreds of guests. When you have fewer guests, your kids are much more likely to get involved in your wedding and be quieter. 

Have a lot of attention on them

Kids love to be at the center of attention. It makes them feel important and loved. So having them at the center of your wedding might be a good idea. For example, you can make them bridesmaids and groomsmen. Girls are particularly excited to be flower girls and ring bearers. Dress them in a beautiful outfit and present the activity to them like it’s a game, and they will have their focus on doing it correctly, but also be adorable while walking down the aisle with all eyes on them. 

Make them comfortable during the wedding ceremony

Although nothing will go according to the plan you so diligently created – it might be cute and entertaining. If you are worrying that your kids will be really uncomfortable and stiff, there are some ways to make them more relaxed and excited about the wedding. 

Assigning them the role of a helper can keep them occupied so much that they do not even notice the uneasiness they are feeling. Ask a member of the wedding party to take care of them while you are not around, to talk and play with them before the ceremony, and to take them out if they start to cry. 

Explain to them what they need to expect during the wedding day and why it is important to you that they act nicely. There is no better way to teach your kids how to behave in certain situations than to talk to them about it logically. Make sure to avoid the reward/punishment system, because it does not teach kids anything else than to look forward to the reward or fear the punishment. 

Another way to make them feel more comfortable during the ceremony is to practice their roles before the wedding day. For example, practice walking down the aisle, or the role of a flower girl or ring bearer. Once they are familiar with the routine they have to perform, they will be much more relaxed when the big day comes.

Involve your kids into planning

Apart from making it very entertaining for your kids, involving them in decorations and food choices for your ceremony can make the wedding unique and intimate. Have them make DIY decorations, such as drawings, hand-written guests’ place cards, putting together the flower basket, etc. Let them help you choose the flowers, the table arrangements, and the food that will be served at the wedding. 

When you show your kids that their opinions matter to you, it will make them feel extra special. They will go around and tell all the guests that they helped pick the cake or the flowers for the wedding. And how adorable is that? 


Although it can be exhausting, having your kids at your wedding can be really important to them. Try to have a smaller, intimate wedding; you will be able to give your kids the attention they require but also have the best special day that you can. And they will have a lot of fun, too.